Maude Vibe Review 2022: This is the Sex Toy I Didn't Know I Needed

After a two-year stretch sans intimate touch from another person, a global epidemic descended (remember that? Oh wait) in which physical contact became a life-threatening offense. By the fall of 2020, like many solo people, I was incredibly sexually frustrated horny. I was horny, okay? I could hear my neighbors in the apartment above me going at it like unneutered dogs, and that didn't help. The show Normal People definitely didn't help (Paul Mescal, call me). In 2021, a shadow turned me on. That's all I'll say about that.

As reliable as my hand was, my imagination began outpacing my fingers, so I bought a couple of different vibrator models; one that resembled a penis more accurately than felt comfortable, followed by a suction vibrator that was about as loud as a fighter jet (which led to using earplugs while jiggling my jelly beannot sexy). Both vibrators left me teetering back in Hand Camp. That is until the Maude Vibe came into my life.

Right out of the pouch (because the Maude Vibe arrives inside a snug canvas carrying case with a small charging cord), I was impressed. What's striking is just how sleek, small, and discreet Vibe's design is. It's shaped like a blend of an egg vibrator and a finger vibrator. The rounded base fits naturally in my hand and tapers to a soft tip. I hold it like a wand, and it makes my lady-bits go, "Lumos."

How does Maude Vibe work?

The minimalist in me appreciates how simple and to-the-point the Maude Vibe is to use. A long press of its single-button turns the vibrator on and off, and a quick press cycles it between three intensities. That's it! But don't be fooled. These intensities are each delicious in their own rightand very quiet. The lowest vibration is a warm, rumbly sensation; the middle ramps up in fluttering; the highest intensity is eye-poppingly powerful yet simultaneously gentle. The first time I used the Maude Vibe, the back-to-back orgasms were so strong that tiny vessels around my eyes burst, giving me freckles. I realize how alarming that sounds, but I promise, I was pleased. My whole body was pleased and relievedwithin under two minutes of contact.

The Maude Vibe is primarily a clitoral vibrator and can be pressed against you in full, or you can stroke the tip and hover it against your clit (this feels great). You could take it a step further and insert the Vibe inside for further stimulation, but so far, external is enough for me (though whichever stimulation you prefer, I recommend pairing the Vibe with Maude's water- and aloe-based lube, which pairs safely with the Vibe's high-quality silicone body). Nicely, the Vibe is water-resistant, comes in four muted colorways, and could easily tuck it into my purse or carry-on without setting off airport security.

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